Wednesday, April 14, 2004

college

top ten reasons i went to william and mary. really.

1. UVA told me to go fuck myself.
2. out of state tuition is a total bitch.
3. accidentally included a photo in all my other applications.
4. im really fucking ugly.
5. came to visit on the one day in the 1000 year astral cycle that williamsburg is sunny. assumed it was always sunny. was fucking wrong.
6. saw someone drinking a beer and thought, 'this campus can party'. it was root beer, and under no fucking circumstances can this campus 'party'.
7. saw a need for the breeding of yet more nerds who tap out at 5'6 and have abnormally large craniums.
8. wanted to use the word 'matriculate', and have the people around me know what the fuck i was talking about.
9. was intent upon doing no work, drinking lots of beer, and receiving C's from an institution that distributes virtually all C's.
10. uh. it was either here or JMU. and harrisonburg smells. there's a huge dog food plant right next to the campus. seriously.

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