Monday, January 26, 2004


I know I said I wasn't going to spew anymore hate, but fuck that. I just discovered that a certain fuck-wad maybe, kinda, sorta was dating someone else, while still pretending he and I were together.

Oh yeah, and apparently they're still going at it.

This, of course, warms the cockles of my heart. There isn't much in this world I depend upon, but loyalty and honesty are pretty fucking high on the list. I'm not saying I blindly trust random douche-bags I meet on the street, but there is a certain coterie of folks in my life I have to believe won't fuck me when I drop the soap. Lest I become a miserable lonely bastard. He used to be a part of this select group, and I had hoped he would stay there.

I know. Pathetic.

I had thought we could somehow manage to remain friends. Sadly, this probably changes the whole fucking dynamic. He had to go fucking with the fucking dynamic. The dynamic was good. The dynamic had promise. And now I can't even call or write or smoke-signal my hate for him. Mostly because he won't talk to me. It makes my tummy hurt.


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